i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize