I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I think my moral compass just broke
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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