he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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