Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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