the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
meet me or not, i'm out of control
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize
