So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
