Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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