she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
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