i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
