in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
