Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
