You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
