WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
