weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
