Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
