the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
