S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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