He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
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