kristin has been a bad kristin
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
