Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Randomize
