how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
we're so committed to being not committed
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
