I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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