the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Randomize
