i don't plan on having that self control this summer
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
