she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Randomize
