Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
