you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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