And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
