are you still at the devil's house?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
