hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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