I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
