Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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