I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯