looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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