While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
