those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
