So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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