worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize