It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom