my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
