The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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