Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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