like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
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