but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
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Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
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Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture