You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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