i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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