You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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