is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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