Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
