Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
